Homecoming

This is the week long celebration of fun AKA Brother Gnewikow. Brother Gnewikow is the embodiment of fun, youthfulness, freedom, and corresponding synonyms. Any who do not consider him by these standards will be publicly executed. This weeklong celebration of Gnewikow is also known as "Hatecoming" for how students are encouraged to show dominance over the other schools, which are known for their drugs, alcohol, sex, and other things that Brother Gnewikow does not encourage.

The Game
In year 1 AK (After Kollross) we will play against Aquinas for our football game. Winning the game is mandatory.

The Dance
Immediately following the game, students are required to report to the MPR for the dance. Some students choose to have a date to this dance, and I know what you are thinking: ''"May I have the honor of being Brother Gnewikow's date?". ''Unfortunately for you, Brother Gnewikow already has a date. Three in fact. This year he has a date with Elvis Presley, Aphrodite (goddess of love), and destiny. Brother Gnewikow will arrive fashionably late to the dance, and upon his entrance students must kneel before him as they are witnessing the son of god walk among their mortal souls.

Throughout the dance students may dance. Acceptable dance moves include the moon walk, cupid shuffle, nae nae, and one dab per person. Unacceptable dance moves include twerking, whipping, and the worm. Performing these dance moves will result in public execution.

Homecoming Court
Students were able to vote on their peers to be in the Homecoming Court, however this is only an illusion of democracy. Brother Gnewikow and the Inner Staff have the final say in the matter, and any students who disagree with their decision will be publicly executed.

At the dance the Homecoming King and Queen will be announced. This is a title of great power and leadership, which also comes with great responsibility. The person with this title will gain immediate recognition and popularity within the ranks of other students. The only person that is deserving of this title is Brother Gnewikow himself, any student who does not accept him as Homecoming King will be publicly executed.

After Dance Activities
Immediately following the dance, all students will go home, to have vivid dreams about their wonderful night and their wonderful leader and comrade, Brother Gnewikow. It is unknown how Brother Gnewikow celebrates his inauguration as Homecoming King following the dance. Some speculate that it is hunting wolves with his bare hands, while others believe that it includes personally executing students who have a GPA below the required 4.0.